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I’m going to recover!

July 16, 2010

I lost my hearing in my left ear in 2007. I only talk on the phone with my right. I depended on it for everything. Two weeks ago I got sick and woke up with a massive earache. I drove myself to the store at 8:30 in the morning and by the time I made it back, it was too late, my eardrum broke. Since I was on swim team for years I am use to my ears being weak and breaking occasionally when I am congested. Except for losing the hearing in my left ear, I always assumed my ear drums would just heal on their own. I assumed wrong. It has been 2 weeks and I have not been able to hear anything around me unless I’m on the phone. That’s the only conversation I was able to have because the phone goes right up into my ear. My grandfather has a hard time hearing and I thought he had Alzheimers, but now I realize he doesn’t, it is really difficult to comprehend dialog after straining to hear all day long.

This was the first time I went to a doctor’s appointment with someone, or I should say many ones! Tenzing brought his two young girls and much to my surprise they all followed me in for my exam, all three of them! It was helpful because I couldn’t really hear what the nurses were saying and the girls were being mindful. The doctor saw me and said I have an infection in my ear, a hole in my eardrum and while he drained my ear, the oldest sister, 5 years old, was absolutely fascinated and didn’t want to leave until she saw him suck all the fluid out of my ear. Her mom had come to meet us there to pick them up. I was impressed, I think she would make a great doctor. I even heard she mentioned it one time. Thankfully, I am now on antibiotics.

I have been to two meetings this week where I practically couldn’t hear a thing anyone was saying. I felt it wasn’t a good enough excuse to either cancel or reschedule. I am glad I went to both of them. They were really important for future projects.

I am starting to be able to talk to Tenzing again. I had a complete melt down about losing my hearing last night and this morning. I couldn’t get up and help with the girls today. I just threw myself back on the bed and cried. I couldn’t live in this world of silent ringing.

I couldn’t communicate – I felt frustrated, isolated and alone.

It wasn’t even that I was. Tenzing was doing every thing he could for me to make me comfortable but I just wanted to hear again.

I’m on my second pill of the day. At the meeting I slowly could pick up more words, heard popping in my ear and later was able to walk to the store side by side with Tenzing and talk. He said, “I think you’re getting your hearing back.”

I nodded my head, “I think so too!”

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